I got to see Da Vinci’s Notebook tonight! It was so awesome, Shaune even said that it was their best concert yet that she’s seen, and I definitely agree, hehe. They played like 3 new songs, which of course were great, and then afterwards we got coffee and drove around for awhile (I got to try out Biblio!), and then we headed home 
So yeah, tonight was actually fun for once. And know what’s crazy? I might get to see Brad tomorrow … after like 2 weeks of not. Watch it not happen (again), but *sigh* … at least I’ll have Neil to cheer me up if I don’t. And speaking of Neil, it’s crazy … like he loves me now. As in the way that Brad does (or did … ). I’m just like woah. I mean, it’s really sweet and cute, and he’s a really nice guy, but sometimes it’s like, okay, don’t like me that much yet. And wow, Shaune sent me this really good essay thing about relationships:
It is reasonable to say that the teenage years are simply confusing times. I myself am thoroughly mystified by a variety of people, actions, places, or situations ranging from physics to learning the waltz. I am horribly confused, though, as to why many adolescent girls find it necessary to endure gratuitous mistreatment from their relationships. During extensive phone conversations and slumber parties, I have listened to many depressing stories pertaining to my friends’ “dating bliss.” It seems that the girls’ significant others have proven themselves to be unworthy of my friends’ affection, much less that of anyone else. Pals of mine have been cheated on repeatedly, ignored, stood up, belittled, and insulted by their boyfriends. If that is not enough, the “gentlemen” have accepted extraordinary gifts from my friends such as stereos, video games and taxi rides while they are unable to return the favor with something as small as a date.
It is certain that a predominant cause to these girls’ gluttony for punishment is the absence of their self-esteems. Being strikingly smart, talented, and attractive, it seems absurd how my friends have the notion that they cannot go out with anyone better than those who they are already dating. Perhaps they believe it is their duty to spoil their boyfriends in order to keep them by means of paying for dinner and movie tickets, driving to their houses for visits, and buying presents for them on random occasions. These girls, however, are the ones who deserve to be taken on dates, presented with gifts, and treated properly. It is evident that someone must be satisfied with whom she is in order to be able to deal with the challenges and personal needs in a relationship.
It is likely that many hopeless relationships continue to endure due to one party’s fear of being alone. Many people would rather have a significant other than be alone, believing a blatant myth stating “single” translates to “unhappy.” Societal pressures from the media urge teenagers to be with someone in order to be cool. What is “cool,” anyhow? What’s more, does life exist outside of the glamorized “boy meets girl” fantasy? Perhaps society is unacquainted with good times spent on the dance floor of a club or in the flashing lights of a cosmic bowling alley. Quite a few girls seem to be unaware of the experiences involving the absence of a boyfriend, not comprehending the benefits involved. A girl cannot enjoy a relationship if she is unable to enjoy life being single, first.
Furthermore, my friends seem to have trapped themselves in poor relationships by an irrational fear of change. Staying with the same miserly and selfish boyfriends for months on end, they have grown used to their partners’ disparaging comments and disrespect. Statements on the lines of “You’re fat,” or “You’re stupid” become acceptable in the girls’ eyes, soon to be regarded upon as the truth. It baffles me how people become so tolerant, listening to the rude abusive remarks from boyfriends who claim to love them. These relationships appear to be pointless and unhealthy, lacking any mutual love or respect of any kind. High school is the time to meet different people and enjoy life while growing as a person at the same time. Relationships are not meant to be barriers of personal growth and self-discovery, nor hinder one from enjoying herself.
It will never cease to baffle me why so many of my friends tear themselves apart on the inside by enduring harmful, worthless relationships. It is logical to believe that if one is unable to love and respect herself, she will consequently be unable to receive respect from any significant other. Perhaps after discovering this knowledge, my friends will “wear the pants” in their relationships, earning themselves the respect and love they deserve. If not, change is the best option, allowing the girls to grow and learn from their experiences. Hopefully, people I know will eventually stop confusing me by refraining from selling themselves short.
Sunday, February 3, 2002 @ 1:03 am 
Oh, and guess what? I get to see Da Vinci’s on Friday! Hopefully Shaune and I will be able to get our schedules coordinated so that we can catch either the 7:30 or 9:30 show, which will be awesome. So yay! Man, haven’t seen them perform in the longest time, so this’ll be good.
Anyway, gonna go now and make dinner and watch that Saturday night MTV thing, so ttyl! I wonder if I’ll stay up ’til 4 am again tonight too (hehe), ’cause I did that last night talking to Neil about guy stuff. Man, that felt good … staying up rocks.
