Shayne and I broke up today … but it actually went pretty smoothly. I feel kinda bad about it, but then again, he felt the same way. Things between us have been weird for about a week so far — like we weren’t communicating that well, and took things way too fast. Plus, with school almost over and us living 4 hours away from each other, we figured it was the better decision. Granted, we’re still gonna be friends and hang out, and next year he’ll only be a half hour away in Staunton. What’s freaky is that he did a tarot card reading on me Monday night, and it said that I’d had success cheating on him … which was true … blah It’s so weird to be saying that … it’s usually not like me. But oh well … he understands why I did (wasn’t over Brian), it was fun while it lasted, and I’m still friends with his whole crew.

Speaking of Brian, I’m so glad we’re back on good terms now. I’m surprised how much I’ve missed him, but I do, and can’t wait for this weekend (even though work will probably suck as usual). Crap, I forgot to call my leads again today. But yeah … I hope I don’t get “sidetracked” like this again. Though it may feel right at first, it fades quickly, and after awhile you start to wonder what exactly you saw in the person. There’s so much you don’t know, so much that you just can’t replace, and uncovering it sucks. I’ve realized that if I have someone like Brian, I need to appreciate both the good and bad qualities of the relationship, learn and grow from them, and ask myself if I really wanna give that up again — unless I’m crazy, the answer will definitely be no